If I had let my eyes decide

I once met an old man who was wrinkled, white, and grey
If I had let my eyes decide, I would have walked away
His stories were of adventure, and mystery and love
And his crows feet grew from praying to the sky and Son above
the whisky on his breath keeps him sober through the day
if I had let my eyes decide, I'd have had too much to say

I once met a woman with stains on all her clothes,
If I had let my eyes decide, I would have gone back home
She told me of the tears that have soaked her tattered skirt,
Her child is at school, and then comes home to sleep in dirt
The coins that line her pockets feed the lining in her stomach
If I had let my eyes decide, I'd have thought quite little of it

I once met a boy with colors on his arm
If I had let my eyes decide, I'd have thought he meant me harm
He told me that his pictures were the still frames of his life
That gave him strength and character for his future, Christian wife
His hope is just to love the ones the world chose to ignore
If I had let my eyes decide, I would have expected more

I once met a girl with a sweater for each season
If I had let my eyes decide, I'd have not asked for a reason
She told me that each sweater hides the scars on both her wrists
And her entourage of friends conceals the only one she'll miss
And soon she won't need sweaters, or even a change of clothes
If I had let my eyes decide, I would have never known

I meet so many people but we never truly meet
I jump to my conclusions as I pass them on the street
I'd never ask them questions, I'd simply just assume
That the way the look must dictate who they were straight from the womb
If I had let my eyes decide, how would I see within
How can I find the heart of man, if all I see is skin

IPOY

August 16, 2008

Open your hearts to us; we have wronged no one, we have corrupted no one, we have taken advantage of no one. I do not say this to condemn you, for I said before that you are in our hearts, to die together and to live together. I have great confidence in you; I have great pride in you; I am filled with comfort. With all our affliction, I am overjoyed. (2 Corinthians 7:2-4)

I wish I could have the same spirit as Paul when he speaks to the Christians of various towns. The epistles were written because people we screwing up, making mistakes, being led astray despite his work to show them the accurate gospel of Jesus Christ. And yet, this insane behavior does not create a heart of bitterness in Paul. Instead he states simply, “I have great confidence in you; I have great pride in you; I am filled with comfort.”

I wish I could say this to my friends who fall habitually into sin. I wish I could say, “I’m proud of you,” when they start behaving like maniacs. But then again, when I was in my downward spirals, I desperately wanted someone to believe in me. I needed the affirmation of love. So Paul gives. And so I want to give to my friends as well.

When someone believes in you, you can’t help but feel the slightest bit empowered. If someone believes in me, I at least wonder what they could see that perhaps I don’t see. We all need someone to see us beyond ourselves, because way too frequently we’re egotistical cry babies.
Paul says that in Christ, we no longer see the world thru human eyes, but thru the eyes of God. Maybe that’s where believing in sinners comes from. God sees me thru the blood of Christ, not the blood on my hands. I can be proud of my friends, and have confidence in them, because I know the Lord does not give up on those he has called according to His good purpose.

Maybe that’s why Paul can say, “I have great confidence in you; I have great pride in you; I am filled with comfort.” Maybe his words weren’t a reflection on their behavior, but a reflection of the hope found in the Holy Spirit that He is faithful to complete the work he began in us. And maybe Paul’s role was not to judge, or to condemn, but to just encourage. To help the people of Corinth see beyond themselves, and to the cross, just like Jesus.

So this gift of encouragement, God…help me be proud of those who have lost their pride, to have confidence in those who have lost heart, and to have comfort for those who can’t stand being in their own skin. If you won’t give up on them, neither shall I.

Shout Out

I just wanted to make a shout out to the woman who waited in the Bruggers store to watch my computer as I was in the bathroom.

Psychology class taught me that you should always designate someone to be in charge of your stuff if you have to leave for a moment. Otherwise, a theif is more likely to succeed in stealing your stuff, even if a slew of people know it doesn't belong to him or her, but you instead. Therefore, I always ask strangers to look out for my stuff if I have to leave. Don't worry, I don't make a habit of this. But when a girls gotta go, a girls gotta go.

So, I write this because in all the hell that is here on earth, there are still heavenly beings willing to lend a helping hand. I chose this lady because I thought she'd be taking more time to eat her sandwich. But while I was gone, she finished, but decided to stick around because she had a responsibility, even though she had every right to renig on that and go on with her evening.

So thank you, helpful lady, for spending few more minutes watching my laptop while I was on the potty. I greatly appreciate you, and hope someone watches out for you as well.

God bless, and be a blessing!

Choice Between Songs

There are times where you have the responsibility to decide between two choices: will I eat now or have a glass of water? Will I watch Law and Order Criminal Intent or Special Victims Unit? Will I go to sleep or write a blog to express my feelings? Hmm...

Some choices are more difficult, or at least more crucial: Will I decide to talk smack about someone or decide to build them up, even though I feel about "this" small in their eyes? Will I choose to resort to old habits and fixes or quickly exit the screen before I send a message I will regret? Will I dwell on resentment or plead to feel forgiveness?

Tonight, I have a choice between two songs: one about love and friendship, the other about bitternes and disappointment. One song was written early in the morning, and the other song was written to end the evening. One song I felt 12 hours ago, and the other I feel right now. But one song will encourage people who read it, and the other song will just make me feel entitled and potentially make others feel bad, and all so I can have a nice pity party because things don't go my way.

That's a pretty selfish, egotistical justification for behavior.

So, against my true feelings, but in honor of that which I wish I felt, I am posting the first song. Mainly, because the first song (in the end) overrides the latter by a landslide. I dedicate it to all my friends who I hope I never have to let go of. And what's nice is that I don't have to try that hard to hold on, either :) Thanks, girls :)

Best of Conversations
by Elise Hindmarsh, July 31 2008

Is it alright if I stop by for a little while?
Is it enough if I just want to see your smile?
Because tonight I don’t want to say a word
Yet I know that when I’m with you I’ll be heard

Can I come by and crash for a little bit
And not feel the need to entertain the one I’m with
But just sit here on the bed and for once be still instead
Of filling every pause because I’m nervous

And I’ve heard that the best friends to have
Give a shoulder to cry on
Even when hurt in the past
Can still be relied on
And even in silence can have
The best of conversations

And I can tell you all my secrets and believe
That you’ll never bring them back around to haunt me
And you can be my sounding board of truth
And not say that I told you so when you say you knew

And I’ve heard that the best friends to have
Give a shoulder to cry on
Even when hurt in the past
Can still be relied on
And even in silence can have
The best of conversations

So thank you for allowing me to be
Exactly who I am, and still believe in me
And for picking things up from where we left off
And for constantly sending your unrelenting,
Beauty making, penetrating love

And I’ve heard that the best friends to have
Give a shoulder to cry on
Even when hurt in the past
Can still be relied on
And even in silence can have
The best of conversations