Cliffhanger

I'm at the top of a roller coaster, knowing that at any second the brakes are going to release and I am going to plummet. I am about to go on a path which is possibly very different from the one I am currently travelling. Something's coming, round the bend, maybe tonight...Do you ever get those gut feelings that something is going to happen that is going to shake your world? Like, GUT feeling..not a feeling or an incling, but one that is unmistakable? Shortness of breath, fear to look around the corner, knowledge that you'll be pushed if you don't take the step...the roller coaster is falling.

I left music 3 years ago to pursue science. I have no regrets. But if I don't go back to music, to pursuing it as my life, I think I'm going to regret it. And I'm terrified.

It has been really hard to read the Bible lately. Not because I am afraid of being condemned or convicted, but because I know He's going to show me something that is going to change me for the rest of my life. He's going to show me something that will send me down a new path, a different path, and it's going to be hard. I cracked open the family Bible today, and read the beginning verses of Joshua. The Lord says whatever step Joshua takes is on a land ordained for Him by the Lord, and that the Lord will never leave or forsake him.

Oh Lord, what are you doing...

Usually these moments would cause me to write a song. But Crystal Lewis beat me to it. So here it is. Time to jump off the mountain.

I built my house here long side this mountain
This rugged mountain that stands so tall
I've had a good life above the lowlands
It's more than I asked for, but less than I dreamed
I've often heard a voice call down to me
If you'd climb higher you'd find wondrous things to see
But the way is steep
And a storm may come...

For such a time as this
Isn't it much to great a risk
I've never flown from the edge of a cliff
Never walked on the water
But if I turned away
How would I know what I have missed
Have I waited all of my life for such a time as this?

I've been content to not ask those questions
That stir the rivers and move the waves
The windless waters are so much more peaceful
They calm my spirit in silent song
I've often wondered what's eluding me
The yearning's meant to free me from complacency
But the way is steep
And a storm my come...

For such a time as this
Isn't it much to great a risk
I've never flown from the edge of a cliff
Never walked on the water
But if I turned away
How would I know what I have missed
Have I waited all of my life for such a time as this?

Sometimes the thrill of soaring has to begin with the fear of falling...