Nothing in this world it seems can sweep me off my feet
Everythings amazing, but only in theory
Someone help me cause Im losing it quietly
Thats just the problem with me these days
Im walking on eggshells
Nothing ever goes wrong and nothing ever goes right
I dont know how to get help
And everything is perfect
But nothing ever moves me
Nothing ever goes wrong and nothing ever goes right
Give me feathers or give me nails
Im walking on eggshells
You might be the one for me but I will never know
I cant fall in love if I've fallen asleep
Will I ever wake up?
Everythings amazing, but only in theory
Someone help me cause Im losing it quietly
Thats just the problem with me these days
Im walking on eggshells
Nothing ever goes wrong and nothing ever goes right
I dont know how to get help
And everything is perfect
But nothing ever moves me
Nothing ever goes wrong and nothing ever goes right
Give me feathers or give me nails
Im walking on eggshells
You might be the one for me but I will never know
I cant fall in love if I've fallen asleep
Will I ever wake up?
The author of this song (Landon Pigg) is reading my heart. It's the dichotomy of Christian knowing and feeling. Everything the Spirit holds, all the truth in the Bible, the beauty of God, it is all amazing. But lately it has only been a theory. It has been a hope and aspiration, not a daily experience. I have felt it before, but it flees. C.S Lewis described this as the downfall to joy: that once you have felt it, you are never satisfied until you can find it again. And in response, you search around endlessly for something that will make the joy return. Thus, I can fall prey to falling in love to what is right in front of me. Placing my hope in something visible as my impatience takes over.
I guess that is why Christians are called to hope for what we do not see. The coming of Christ, the full and active reign of the Lord, and joy that never fades.
I watched Star Wars Episode III this afternoon. No way is the Force an allegory for Christ's power to his people, but the good vs. evil theme ultimately draws parallels. In one scene, Anakin is talking to Yoda about his premonitions of Padme's death. I felt the Lord speaking directly to me in Yoda's response:
Yoda: Careful you must be when sensing the future Anakin. The fear of loss is a path to the dark side.
Anakin Skywalker: I won't let these visions come true, Master Yoda.
Yoda: Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them do not. Miss them do not. Attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed that is.
Anakin Skywalker: What must I do, Master Yoda?
Yoda: Train yourself to let go... of everything you fear to lose.
I am afraid to lose certain dreams, yet the Lord calls me to relinquish these dreams to Him. It is not a detachment in the sense of Buddism or mysticism, but relinquishing control to the Ruler of the Universe, and holding onto Him at the deepest level. I have to train myself in godliness, in Him, and in a sense, train myself to let go of everything I fear to lose. That which I fear to lose, so much as to reject my Father, is an idol. An adulterous, idolatrous whore. That is the identity from which Jesus Christ saved me. Will I allow my fear to turn me to the dark side?
Will I ever wake up to feel the joy of Christ? Yes. But this season is of discipline. Am I willing to let go of that which I fear to lose in order to overcome the fear of losing?
Its time to stop walking on eggshells and just take the step.
*crunch*
I guess that is why Christians are called to hope for what we do not see. The coming of Christ, the full and active reign of the Lord, and joy that never fades.
I watched Star Wars Episode III this afternoon. No way is the Force an allegory for Christ's power to his people, but the good vs. evil theme ultimately draws parallels. In one scene, Anakin is talking to Yoda about his premonitions of Padme's death. I felt the Lord speaking directly to me in Yoda's response:
Yoda: Careful you must be when sensing the future Anakin. The fear of loss is a path to the dark side.
Anakin Skywalker: I won't let these visions come true, Master Yoda.
Yoda: Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them do not. Miss them do not. Attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed that is.
Anakin Skywalker: What must I do, Master Yoda?
Yoda: Train yourself to let go... of everything you fear to lose.
I am afraid to lose certain dreams, yet the Lord calls me to relinquish these dreams to Him. It is not a detachment in the sense of Buddism or mysticism, but relinquishing control to the Ruler of the Universe, and holding onto Him at the deepest level. I have to train myself in godliness, in Him, and in a sense, train myself to let go of everything I fear to lose. That which I fear to lose, so much as to reject my Father, is an idol. An adulterous, idolatrous whore. That is the identity from which Jesus Christ saved me. Will I allow my fear to turn me to the dark side?
Will I ever wake up to feel the joy of Christ? Yes. But this season is of discipline. Am I willing to let go of that which I fear to lose in order to overcome the fear of losing?
Its time to stop walking on eggshells and just take the step.
*crunch*
1 comment:
elise,
the lord must have had us on the same wavelength today cuz i totally posted about hope and de-taching ourselves from this world today. so great! i love the star wars reference, too. you're awesome, thanks for your honest heart :)
~sarah
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